My affliction

You know that scene in Affliction where Nick Nolte pulls out his own tooth with the pliers? I spent a good three hours thinking about that scene last night, sitting up in bed with my nose running and my eyes puffing up and my swollen sinuses pounding against the roots of my teeth. I was breathing okay when I went to bed, but by 2 a.m. I was so congested I felt like I was going to drown. In my pissed off misery I kept remembering Nick Nolte, thinking that if only I could get rid of my aching teeth I might finally be able to relax and get some sleep ....

It's been like this for several nights in a row: shallow tortured breathing, throbbing eyes and sinuses, and weird nightmares. Basically I'm sleep deprived, oxygen deprived, and totally exhausted. As of this morning though I can tell I'm over the worst of it, and I'm looking forward to getting some good work done today – finally! Actually I'm kind of putting off getting started, because I'm afraid of everything I have to do today and I'm trying to live in denial for as long as possible. So far I've fixed my computer, run the disk utility, made tea, blown my nose, peeled an orange, cut up a long roll of paper towel for napkins ....

Eh. Blah. I really wish I could just go back to bed. I should just delete this whole boring post. I'm only writing because writing is my security blanket when I feel like a cranky overwrought two-year-old, and if I can't have a nap, at least I can rub my blankie a little bit before I get to work.