Hullk donuts

I took a picture of these in 7-11 today. Click for the big picture – the big one is always better.

Mr. A and I have been snickering behind our hands about this new Hulk movie for several weeks now, every time we see it mentioned, in connection with a friend's husband whose claim to fame for the last five years has been the fact that the back of his head appears briefly in a crowded restaurant scene in the 2003 version of the Hulk, hailed by the Internet Movie Database as "a film which is widely considered a failure, both financially and artistically."

Never having seen the film I can't say whether I agree with that or not. It did strike me as funny though that someone's remaking it again so soon after the last one bombed. What is it about this story that people respond to? Is it the rage? The fear that if you let it out, it will destroy everyone around you? And what does any of that have to do with donuts?

And what will our almost-famous friend do now, now that there's going to be a different Hulk movie out? He'll have to start qualifying his cameo. Maybe we can call his version "Hulk Classic."

Anyway. Slow day for news. I'm still not feeling great, and not much wanting to write, and especially not wanting to write about how I "feel," even though that is one of the more important functions of this blog for me – to help me keep track of my health, emotional, mental and otherwise.

One thing I will say is that it's interesting to have the glucometer to consult when things start feeling not quite right. My tendency when this starts happening is to berate myself for being a bummer and a terrible human being, trying to convince myself that it's all in my head, that I should be able to suck it up and snap out of it, etc. But when I wake up in the morning and my blood sugar is 40 points higher than it should be, that's a pretty clear sign that I'm not just making it all up out of weakness, laziness or a desire to slack off.

I don't know if it should make me feel better or worse to have scientific proof that there's something "real" the matter with me. Part of me always feels so guilty for not having made more of my life and talents, for not being more interesting or successful or social or fill in the blank. Lately I'm trying to notice when I'm comparing myself to others, and stop it. As much as I would love for things to be otherwise, there are some good reasons, real reasons, why I sometimes let myself go slow, limit my commitments, hold back, disengage, hermitize.

I get tired of making excuses for these behaviors. I don't like feeling this way. And I think I've spent enough time thinking about it for now. It will pass eventually, and until it does I'm already doing all the things I know how to do to get through it. Chief among these is my upcoming vacation, which I'm actually starting to get a little excited about. I'm taking a week off, and I'm going to be spending most of it in Utah. This time, I want to actually GO some places and try to see a few old friends I never seem to have time to see. At the end of the week my parents and a few of my siblings and their families are carpooling to Boulder to spend the fourth of July at my sister's place. I've never been to Colorado before and am quite looking forward to that.

Tomorrow I'm flying to Las Vegas again for another press check. Management had decided to use a cheaper local printer after my last trip, but we convinced them to continue with the one we've been using and I'm glad, because I enjoy these little trips. This time I have tentative plans to catch up with an old high school friend who lives there now, who is famous for his sideshow work, among other things.

P.S. It just occurred to me – I should've checked the inside of those donuts! Do you think it's hollow and empty under the Hulk picture, like a regular glazed donut? Or filled with some kind of oozy green creme?